First Parish Unitarian UniversalistWhat's Our Mission?
A sermon preached by the Reverend Diane Teichert
First Parish Unitarian Universalist - Canton, MA
March 11, 2001
Thursday is my sermon-writing day, but because of the snowstorm, I had the time on Tuesday to do some leisurely reading related to the theme for this sermon-reading of the sort I rarely get to do. So, on Thursday, I should have been in great shape to just fly with inspiration.
But, I wasn't. Some disquietude had intervened. The announced theme for today-our identity as First Parish, what this congregation means to those who consider themselves to be part of it, and how do we want to describe that to the world?-well, this theme seemed rather lame and uninteresting.
"What's bothering you? Get yourself together! You only have today and the morning is slipping away. The kids will be home interrupting you in no time and you've got other plans for tonight.Come on.get going!
Another cup of tea. A piece of toast with butter and cinnamon sugar.
Then I knew what my problem was. It was the morning paper. There had been too many disturbing things in it. I had even drafted a letter to the editor while I was eating my breakfast!
I was infuriated by columnist Adrian Walker's diatribe against the General Manager of the MBTA, who had declined to run a sexually suggestive, demeaning of women, distasteful ad for an upcoming movie on the T. I wanted to thank Mr. Prince for exercising his good moral judgement.. I told him I was glad someone in a position of authority had done what he felt was morally right on behalf of the common good, despite financial loss. I was relieved to know that my kids and plenty of others (adults, too) would not be stuck face to face with that offensive ad in a crowded train or while waiting at Park Street for the one green line train that never comes when you need it!
The columnist and the ad were the least of the disturbing things in Thursday's Boston Globe, however. There was yet another article about the Vermont teens accused of murdering two Dartmouth professors, a story that leaves me with the uncomfortable acknowledgement that no parent knows for sure what is going on with their teens. Do I know what websites my fifteen year old son visits? Does he order anything without my knowledge? We've laid out some guidelines, but do we check on him constantly? Would it help if we did? Do we know him well enough to place the trust in him that we do?
What was even more disturbing, only because it was still new news: Inside, on page three, was a report of yet another school shooting; the second this week. The first, as you may recall, happened on Tuesday at a public high school Sandee, California: a fifteen year old boy allegedly killed two and wounded another thirteen people.
The second school shooting, at a Catholic school in Williamsport PA on Wednesday, was notable because the student with the gun was a girl. For that reason, even though the victim did not die of her wounds, I think it should have been on page one with a big headline. Equal Gun Rights for Girls. Is it only a matter of time before girls, too, can aim well enough to kill?
The Globe should have run the story of the girl gunman in place of the page one story about two Providence women who, bucking gender stereotypes in a more positive manner, had died in a crash off the coast of Iceland on the first leg of their flight around the world. Or, the editors could have bumped the front page story about another challenger of gender stereotypes, feminist psychologist and author Carol Gilligan, who is escaping the rigidities of Harvard for a happier, more collaborative academic environment elsewhere.
More power to these women who, like myself and many of you women or the wives, sisters, mothers and daughters of you men, have entered professions and avocations once only open to men.
More power to us successful adults, women and men, but what in the world is going on with our youth, boys and girls? More power to us, but what can we do with that power to stem this tide of violence perpetrated by the young against each other?
In Boston, when the level of concern about gang related shootings and other crime involving youth rose high enough, community leaders responded, among them the clergy and their congregations, demanding improved policing, gun buy-back programs, better schools. The churches also interceded themselves and started youth programs of their own, believing they could make a difference. By late in the last decade, Boston's homicide rates among youth declined. There must have been many factors, but I believe the community's response helped.
Now, in small towns and suburbs, we must do the same. Community leaders, police, school officials, clergy and their congregations, must intercede. I believe that any of us who own guns must turn them into the police and we must dare to inquire of the parents of our children's friends: do you own a gun? Let gun control start at home, in our own homes and those of our neighbors.
Violence could happen in any of our towns as easily as it did in Etna NH, Williamsport PA or Sandee, CA. In fact, it did happen here recently, right here in Canton, though it didn't involve a weapon. You may remember that last June, a young man was killed by a train here in Canton. Matt was a Canton High School student, known to many of the high school aged young people here at First Parish. Matt's death was ruled a suicide. Most of his friends, and others who knew him as a fellow member of the Gay Straight Alliance at the high school, felt sure it was a suicide. School officials acknowledged it as such. At the wake, his father worriedly expressed to me his concern for Matt's friends, "I don't want this to be a summer of blood," he said. Out of that concern, he invited me to speak to them at Matt's funeral mass.
Another time, I will tell the whole story and all I learned from my first experience ministering in the context of a suicide, but for now, I will share some of what I actually said to the kids during the Mass.
"This has been a sad and profoundly upsetting week. It may be your first experience with the death of a friend. Certainly, we hope it is your first, and only, experience with the suicide of a friend.
It will be many hours, days, maybe months and possibly years before you come to understand the impact of this week on your life. But, that is how life is. We learn and grow from all that happens to us, especially the hard things. But, it takes time. Just as we learn from our mistakes, our failures, the wrong things we do, we grow stronger from the hardships we endure. Like this one.
Hope and endurance-these have been the themes of this Funeral Mass in honor of Matt. His dad chose the Bible readings with these themes in mind, for you, Matt's friends.
Even at a time such as this, there is a light inside each of us, the light of love. Whether you call it God or not, there is a light inside each of us, the light of love. Sometimes, especially at hard times, you have to cup your hands around that light, to protect it a little from the wind and rain. But, you can help each other trust in that light. Look to your families, for they love the light of love that is in you, even if they don't always know the best way to show it. May this be a time of embracing in families, and among friends, embracing even differences. The shared light of love will help you endure and bring you hope."
I closed by quoting a rock song I thought they would know, the song "Put Your Lights On" by Everlast on the CD "Supernatural" by Santana. It's like that gospel tune, "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine."
"Hey now, all you sinners, put your lights on, put your lights on.
Hey now, all you lovers, put your lights on, put your lights on.
Leave your lights on, you better leave your lights on
Because there's a monster living under my bed,
Whispering in my ear.
There's an angel with a hand on my head
She says I've got nothing to fear.
There's a darkness deep in my soul
I still got a purpose to serve.
So let your light shine, into my home
God don't let me lose my nerve
Hey now, all you sinners, put your lights on, put your lights on
Hey now, all you children, leave your lights on."
Some regretted that I publicly named that death a suicide. But, many of the young people at the Mass, the few of their parents that attended, all of the First Parish people who were present, several St. John's parishioners, and other clergy who learned of it later, expressed their appreciation that someone told the truth.
I hoped to help them understand that it is the truth that sets us free. For I did, and still do, believe that it would be the truth that would help Matt's friends through their shock and grief and the turmoil of their own youthful doubts and worries.and into a confidence that even though we all have our shadows of the soul, we also each have a light to shine and a purpose to serve in this world. "Leave your lights on!"
Yes, indeed, we say to our young people, leave your lights on! And, let the lights of others shine as well! If you've got thoughts of snuffing yours out, or anyone else's, remember that we love you and care about you and will do whatever we can to help you out. Ask for help!
One of the ways we express our support here at First Parish is in our commitment to a thriving Religious Education program for our children and youth. A program that holds them and guides them, that brings adults (as Sunday School teachers) into their lives who care about them and share their parents' values but are not their parents. A program that teaches them about right and wrong, justice and compassion, about being good and doing good, about the varieties of religious traditions the world over, and about how to nurture their own inner light.
Next week, if fact, in our Sunday service we will see the fruits of their recent study of the UU Principles and Purposes. Through art, drama, poetry, music and even (I understand) some ribald parody, pre-schoolers right through high schoolers will take this stage in rehearsal after our service today and for real next Sunday, to teach and lead us, their elders, about the ethical values covenanted in our religious movement.
Also, I am thrilled to report that, after about five years with a dormant high school youth group, we have re-created one again in the past month. I know I express the gratitude of the congregation in thanking Sarah McGill, our Director of Religious Education, for her vision that this could happen despite setbacks; to the RE Committee for keeping hope alive; to the parents for their understanding; to the congregation for funding; and especially to the two new youth group advisors, Kitty and Joe, for providing along with Sarah the adult support that such an effort absolutely requires.
On February 11th, the Youth Group had their first meeting, at which they did some planning and then converged on the First Parish kitchen to make home-made chocolates and beautiful paper boxes. Just last week, they went to a movie together. Such joy it is that such an important commitment has been made anew by First Parish!
We make many such commitments as a faith community, if you stop to think about it. I want to pause now and ask you to reflect on which of them mean most to you.
Our commitments are so varied. We are committed to having a vibrant worship life with excellent music, to accepting great diversity in our theologies and religious backgrounds, to working for justice in our community and especially this year to racial justice, to helping those in need, to encouraging the spiritual and ethical growth of ourselves as adults, and to being a support community for one another. We're also committed to maintaining our property as a home base for these commitments. These commitments, one might say, describe our "mission." It's what we do that we value and support.
Which of these present commitments are most important to you? Which of them keep you coming? What is important to you that I haven't mentioned?
If you are very new to First Parish or are just visiting today, you may not know what our commitments are. I would instead invite you to reflect on what it is that you do or would look for in a religious community, a spiritual home.
Now I would invite you, using the lined side of the index card provided as you entered, to jot down the one, two or three commitments of First Paris that are most important to you. Please write only on the lined side of the index card.
PAUSE
I sense among us a remarkable potential. It feels to me that this congregation is on a forming edge. It's like when you are out in the surf, and you see the swell that indicates a wave forming. I've never used a surfboard, but I love to body surf. And I know what that swell feels like if you're out far enough, but not too far. You can rise with the swell, and if you kick really hard, and if you're timing is just right, and if you're lucky that the swell becomes a wave, you can ride its crest. Face forward, eyes open, you're one with the wave, carried smoothly up onto the beach, exhilarated, jubilant, victorious!
In congregational life, one never beaches, for that would be our demise. Instead, there are ebbs and flows. There are storms, and there are days when the sea is choppy, and others when it's placid; there are lulls between good waves when you do somersaults to break the tedium of treading water.
In congregational life, like body-surfing, one must notice where the swells are. Not all swells become the great ride, of course, but if one is under you before you notice it, you're not likely to get a ride at all. In congregational life, the swells don't just materialize out of the depths, we have a hand in creating them and making ridable waves out of them.
If I'm right, that First Parish is on the forming edge of some good waves, where do you see the swells rising? What new or increased commitment would excite you? Do you have an expectation that First Parish is not yet meeting, one that nevertheless seems realizable, with some hard work and good timing? How would you describe the places of potential for our congregation? What would need to be in place for the wave to materialize, assuming money wasn't an issue?
I invite you to use the blank side of your card to note your responses to these kinds of questions in a few phrases. If what you wrote on the lined side of the card was descriptive of the present-which of First Parish's current commitments are most important to you-what aspects of its mission is most important to you. Then, what I am asking you to write on the blank side of the card will be about the near future-which of First Parish's potentials are most compelling for you?
What one, two or three specific hopes do have? Try to be specific about a general hope-for example, if you see a swell rising in, say, the arena of humor, try to write more than "fulfill our potential for humor" but, rather, add, "send the minister to joke school" or "let's hire a comedian to entertain us at a potluck supper " or "can we offer clowning workshops." If you sense a place of potential, but don't have any ideas as to how it could be reached, that's ok, write it down anyway. And, if you want to sign your card, that would be excellent, but it's not required.
There's a blank bulletin board in the Parish Hall. During the Closing Hymn, please pass your cards to the aisle where they will be collected by two members of the Parish Committee. They will post the cards on the bulletin board for us to look at during our Coffee-Fellowship Hour. Your statements will be compiled, reviewed by the Parish Committee, and any that are specific to a certain committee will be forwarded to that committee for their consideration in planning for next year's activities and budget.
Again, what new or increased commitment would excite you? Do you have an expectation that First Parish is not yet meeting, one that nevertheless seems realizable, with some hard work and good timing? How would you describe one, two or three places of potential for our congregation? What would need to be in place for the wave to materialize, assuming money wasn't an issue?
PAUSE
If you are waiting in the surf for the next good riding wave, and nothing seems to be coming, you might turn your head to look far down the beach to the right or the left. You see waves in various stages of formation. Often, the next wave down from where you stand looks perfect. You can watch as it rises, crests, curls, and crashes, rushing in foam up onto the shore. "Ah," you wish, "Too bad I'm not there!"
We're here. We probably can't ride all the good waves at once. With lots of us out there in the surf, watching for swells and ready to rise to the challenge of kicking real hard at just the right time, we're sure to catch some of them and collectively, get some good rides! That's our mission!
Amen.